The Shine of Stability

Have you ever met someone and they radiated contentment, compassion and acceptance? Without saying a word, they made you feel safe and secure? Did you find yourself fascinated by them, unable to look away as they went about their life? Were you surprised to catch yourself saying things you never thought you’d say or sharing your innermost thoughts after only the briefest of connection?

That is what it feels like to be around someone who is elementally stable and neutral. Someone living in the Moment. Someone who’s surrendered to the present and has no expectations of those around them, only boundaries. They shine with serenity, vulnerability, and hope and it is infectious and appealing. They shine with Synergy.

Some people are naturally born with greater stability in their core structure, meaning they can be neutral not only when alone but also interacting with others, and have always been that way. On the Periodic Table the elements displaying this calm, peaceful behaviour even in the presence of other atoms, the family of elements on the right, are known as the Noble Gases. Group (1)8, with 8 electrons in the boundary energy cloud.

Noble meaning non-reactive. Stable. Not volatile. The clouds of electrons surrounding the Noble gases are satisfied, meaning they do not need to discharge negativity or collect it. The stability of Noble gases is what all other elements are striving for via volatility and reactivity. Every atom wants to feel the fullness of satisfaction, the contentment of completion, and is capable of attaining it.

Both positives and negatives exist in every atom and every personality. They must, because balance requires opposing forces. The Noble Gases are electrically balanced and internally stable. Only in extreme circumstances will they react with other substances. Their behaviour is the same when in isolation and when exposed to the environment.

Noble Gases are used to light up neon signs, fill helium balloons, even prevent reactions between other elements.

People with stability and serenity play a similar role, lighting up others, lifting their spirits, and insulating them from volatility.

Other elements become like Noble gases through forming bonds, through developing relationships and interactions, in order to either release negativity or to collect it.

People too become stable by forming bonds, developing relationships and interactions, aspiring to find satisfaction and live in the Moment.

Clouds of Negativity

Atoms have a positive nucleus, a core of protons balled up a bit like our sun, while clouds of negative electrons orbit the nucleus similar to planets (well, more like asteroid belts) orbiting the sun. The charges of an atom add up evenly to make the atom energy neutral when it exists alone in a vacuum. Neutral does not mean stable, though. Stability on an atomic level comes from satisfaction within the electron clouds.

Most humans are also a mix of positive and negative emotional charges and are vulnerable to giving or receiving negativity in interactions with other people in an attempt to find satisfaction and stability. A rare few are so internally stable that no matter what is going on around them, they don’t transfer negativity and in fact bring those around them relief and protection from emotional volatility.

Expose most atoms to other atoms and they react to one degree or another over time, because most atoms are vulnerable to either losing or gaining electrons. A small number of atom types are so internally balanced that they never lose or gain negativity except in the rarest, most exceptional circumstances and are often used to insulate other elements from the environment.

Balance and stability requires the equalization of opposing forces. It is not about the eradication of negativity, it is about accepting the presence of negativity and finding ways to counterweight it.

Chemical reactivity comes from a lack, from empty spots in the outside layer of the electron clouds surrounding every atom. Atoms lacking enough electrons, enough negative energy, desperately seek to change that imbalance. The magic number is eight, with few exceptions, and elements just shy of 8 electrons in their peripheral energy cloud will grab onto the nearest negativity to fill themselves up. While elements with few electrons in the outer shell will give them away to drop down to the lower energy level for stability.

People either try to elevate or lift themselves up to the next energy level or drop themselves down to the one below. They use people and things around them, either boosting themselves, or boosting others.

It’s elemental!

Spiteful Pleasure?

We’re told to feel guilt and shame for the thoughts in our head. We self-chastise for offenses we didn’t commit, merely imagined. But…really…it’s NOT the thought that counts.

Thoughts and feelings are mere shadows in the Mattersphere, somewhat perceptible but not able to take action on their own. You are your actions, not your thoughts, in the material world. Even in the Eternal world, you are not your thoughts because thoughts are data fragments floating around in our local hard drive brain, they were not supposed to take up residence! They will not follow us in the present moment or in death.

Ever taken spiteful malicious pleasure in someone else’s misfortune and then felt awful afterward? Even though you had nothing to do with their circumstances and did not bring about their pain, did you feel guilt and criticize yourself for not being a good person?

Why?

What did you DO to deserve your self-condemnation?

You had a thought.

That thought was satisfying to you. Remove judgement from it, because judgement is a construct better left to Eternity. The thought was not malicious or spiteful. It was simply a thought, and your satisfaction in it simply satisfaction. Accept both without guilt or shame.

Synergy created us to be curious and hopeful and to seek satisfaction. Feelings are supposed to be sensory responses to the social environment, not tied to our internal environment. Thoughts are meant to pre-process Datter, and then disappear, not get stuck in loops of thought – feeling – thought – feeling.

The short circuit of our self-awareness makes us judge ourselves about the sources of satisfaction and pleasure, whether a thought or an act, and then society perpetuates that judgement. Notice children have no shame or guilt? If you learn to live in the Moment and accept your thoughts as simply information triggered by the events and circumstances around you, and you let go of contempt and criticism of those thoughts, and even of past behaviours. Did you hurt someone? Let it go but don’t do it in another Moment. Did someone hurt you? Let it go but keep safe boundaries in another Moment.

When you occupy the Now, there is no wrong or right. There is acceptance, curiosity, hope, joy, growth and gratitude. No matter whether the Moment includes pain and strife or ease and comfort, acceptance and satisfaction can be found. Every one of us is trying to survive the best we can in each moment, and each moment is what it needs to be.

Neutrality verses Stability

The Periodic Table of the Elements organizes all the types of atoms based on physical and chemical properties. Atoms behave in a predictable consistent manner in set conditions.

So too do most humans. Although we may subconsciously blind ourselves to the predictable patterns, they are there. Accepting they exist is the first step toward becoming curious about how to interact safely with all the elemental personality types and finding joy and satisfaction in safe interactions no matter how volatile the personalities involved. Every person we meet is a gift from Synergy and if we open it with grateful curiosity we will obtain the hidden treasure found within the most challenging of relationships.

We are what we are.

But we can become more through our interactions just like the elements become more through forming bonds with other elements.

All atoms on their own are electrically neutral. There is balance between the core nucleus of positively charged protons and the orbiting clouds of negatively charged electrons. If left isolated, no atom is in and of itself volatile. They only become reactive in the presence of other atoms, whether their same type or a different kind entirely.

Humans are like that too. Leave us alone, without outside influence, and we don’t react if there’s nothing to react to! We are neutral, balanced in our positives and negatives. That person, who exists independent of humanity, is our Eternal self, the best and most wonderful version of our core structure. Every single one of us is beautifully neutral and balanced on our own.

But humans, like atoms, do not exist in an empty vacuum. We must interact from the moment of birth until we either die or isolate ourselves in a safe space. Those interactions are driven by our core structure and the structure of the people we associate with.

In the presence of other atoms, elements may become reactive dependant on the core structures involved. The objective in chemical reactions is not electrical neutrality, but rather structural stability. This is achieved by the movement of negatively charged electrons because positive charges cannot be changed. So atoms need to either give negativity away, or receive negativity, to get satisfied. Some are more volatile than others in their effort to attain chemical stability.

Humans are like that too. We feel the drive to either generate negativity in others which, be honest, can be very satisfying in the moment, or we seek to alleviate negativity which is also satisfying. Some people are more volatile than others in their effort to attain emotional stability.

There are 18 families of core structures on the Periodic Table but 8 are the fundamental ones most involved in our lives. Only one of those groups is both chemically and electrically stable, the rest have varying degrees of reactivity.

Understanding human reactivity as the quest for emotional stability while respecting the underlying balanced core structure allows the formation of lasting, productive, stable bonds.

Macrocosm reflects microcosm…we are what we are composed of.